Take Your Sacrifices

The flooded plains of the Bonneville Salt Flats, Utah at sunset/ Photo by the author

I would have your hands
Be rough with me
But your heart be soft

Dreaming of your body
Covering me
Like the newly fallen dew

I am wet
Carried away
The soft parts of my form
Tempted to ripen before
Your eyes

Sent down
I fill my mouth
With the elixr
From which my life
Came forth

I would have your mind
Be empty
And your hands
Be full
Of me
But when you have taken
your fill
I would have
Your consciousness
Imbued with my scent

Overwrought with the moment
Of me
So you can never sleep again

I would have you
Inside me
The tender part of me
Filled with the inflamed mind
Of you
Stirring, the world fills
With iridescent droplets
Of life
I too am filled
Never wanting to be redeemed

god, what use for you have I now?
You jealous, angry and posessive
Monster of the ages
Take your sacrifices
And fall on your knees
Before my love 

For love
The greatest of these treasures
Is greater still than you

A sapphire lake shone forth
Like the sky
A jewel whose light the Gods envied
But how I envy him too
The sky that took you

Ever empty
Yet full in the spectral lights
The sky beneath which we make love
Makes love to the earth
When we have departed

Unobstructed
My heart sits still
In your monolithic embrace
Fixed firm on your love
I am liberated
From the temporary nature
Of mortality
Respectibility
Which hinders creation
Strangles the ages
With shackles for the mind

I am free now
Swimming in the lake of you
Where you once swam
In the embrace of so many lovers
But now, the seed that sewed you
Has sewn a promise in me
And let that god be jealous
Commanding
Vengeful

I shall make him bow
In awe of a greater love
Whose name knows no chains
Whose passion can never be bound

The greatest of these gifts
Is love
Where stirs in its lonely cage
A heart on fire and liberated

Come take your sacrifices
On the distant shore
And while you are there
O god
Bother never to return

Flight of the Jabiru

(To S, for the sake of remembrance)

The Sun has been swallowed
Like a ripe mandrake
Intoxicating the tongue
Of the Sun-God
To sleep
His heaven, His veil, His firmament
Glowing defiantly
Harboring the wings of spirits
Going down, going down

I never feared
The flight of jabirus
Whose winged grace
Signals the death throes
Of the sun
His kingdom, once on fire
With liquid gold
Cools my breath
A heavy, drowsy curtain
As the wings of spirits
Go down, go down

Did you hear
The flight of the jabirus?
Their wings disturbed
My placid countenance
Rippling like the waters of a mill-pond
Stirring, casting doubt on permanence

I waded in after them
Those ripples of wet blue
An azure mirror of the sky
Flaring above
But the shadows of their wings
Gave my heart notice
That you were gone
Gone, all gone now

A lonely torch burns
As the sun retreats
In a torrent of red, orange
And sanguine illumination
My heart stopped
When it saw that you had stopped
Gone down, down, down

This is what wise men say
Happens to us all
Even in the flush of youth
Sensual, carnal ecstasy

Lovers exhaust love
Climaxes leave tingling skin
Wanting more
Hearts left alone
In the startling sunset
Pine still for more light
Your promises made
In the heat of the moment
Now whisper and die
Away, away, away

I could not halt
The flight of the jabiru
Those Souls in light-dappled plumage
So I brought a candle
To illuminate your grave
And tears gave renewed life
To the hot desert sand
Flickering, flickering, flickering

The sunset called your name
My heart, still in love
Could not help but to listen
Listen, listen

I let them carry you away
Enfolded by wings
Whose tips had stirred
The Imperishable Stars
A host of spirits
To make light the path
Once trodden by darkness

Darkness, you let in light
Light, you kiss the darkness
And make love to twilight
Even as Mother Heaven swallows
The golden flesh of the sun

I cannot call you back
From your lofty flight
The jabiru comes and departs
Again through the western passage
All of the things I have loved
Have been removed
With those elegant wings
Softer to you now
Than the kiss of my bed
Naked and charged with youth

I call to the West
Waiting for your return
Like the face of the rosy sun
Bursting in blood and fire
Between the legs of Mother Heaven

They make their flight
Signalling the departure
Of all cherished things
Coming and going
Coming again and going again
Through the endless
Passage of the night

Gold Covers Me

A liquid gold sky spreads out over the Bonneville Salt Flats, Utah/ Photo by the author

(For S, even though it doesn't quite make sense)

Gold covers me
To live in your twilight
Where no man has access
Jade becomes my heart
You greedily possess
Locked away inside you
The flame of me strikes
The earth like turquoise

Uncover me
I will find you
Having thirsted for redemption
I find in your cool arms
Cool arms
Warm fingers
Marble lips, sculpted by the Gods
A light you once concealed
I bring back to the world
Above

Gold
The sun brings me back to life
For loss had claimed me
I staggered to and fro
To and fro
Wading through casual flesh
Skin and thighs

And so many available beds
Regret has never known me
But sorrow has taken me
As an ardent lover
Not as tragic as death
When darkness falls
Is it still not dark?

Gold
A treasure clasped
In patient hands
A heart gathering souls to it
As light to shattered glass
How you cut so deliciously
To feel you
Even in this terrible way
Is finer than the vain promises
Of God or man

What have I not sacrificed
For you?
My treasure, once guarded
For only the Gods to see
So easily revealed its turquoise light
The dewy leaves of trees
Playing in the breath of Summer
Faithfulness undaunted
By deceit
Love uncowed by a heavy hand

How could I fail
To serve the best in you
When the light in me
Longed to rush in
And placate the shadows?

Gold
Let me hold you again
Press my lips against you again
Hard and wet and salty
Let me cut loose my eagle's wings
To wrap around you
And in the dead of night
Defend you

Finally life descends
Into the other world
Casting out what frail breath wove
Into the fabric of your flesh
All is gone, all is silence
The earth reclaims pleasures and triumphs
But in its stillness is covered
In the spreading gold of the morning sun

What Do You Care For?

A cold Winter evening falls on the Bonneville Salt Flats, Utah/ Photo by the author

A blue veil
Clings to the hot mountains
Your silence unnerves me
Carries me back to an ancient time
Before language divided us

I search the scattered clouds
For answers to my plight
What wandering spirits
Will come when invited
I would rather lose myself
In loneliness
Than be reminded by
Their solemn touch

I parted that veil
To look beyond the ridge
Of fallen twilight
Gathering droplets
Of fragile dew
On my fingertips

Your navel excited my tongue
When found
Your flesh invited me in
To swim in the clouds
Without regrets
How I wish you had invited me
To stay indefinitely

When called
I risked all
As I always do
The sacrifice justified
By the infinite pleasure
Conjoined in your heart
The radiant amber light
A high plateau
Crowned by a sunlit summit

Why should I go down again
Only to be deflated?
These heights of yours
So exquisitely constructed
Will endure on my lips
Long after the moment of you
Subsides

But what do you care
For a poem
A naked heart
Two hands open in desire
Two legs entwined like tendrils
In a verdant field
What do you care
For the one thing
You can never fully possess?

I Carried Them Away With Me

The startling beauty of the mountains west of Wendover, Nevada/ Photo by the author

(For S on your rainy day)

I am not afraid
To give everything away
For a moment, an hour, a day
When, with you, time has lost its validity
The power of the future is undone

Immortality, I can taste
The beginnings of you
Which the Ancients sought
And some found before
Their own glories collapsed

And what monuments shall you
Leave behind?
Fame, fortune, the admiration
Of the masses?
Those pale and are ephemeral too
I want none of them
Between my legs

What takes hold of my senses
Is the present field of your body heat
A light-dappled shadow
Casting its essence
Through the room

I feel as if I never lost you
Your skin was my skin
Your sorrows, my suffering to carry
And where have I carried you?
With me, with me

Sunlight gives way to invading darkness
I know you dwell there
Secrets half-revealed
I know you unveiled these, too
Did you ever reach the bottom
Of these mysteries?
I did
And I carried them with me, with me

I had a dream
When you and I were alone together
That you and I were alone together
Your fear having been lassoed
In a golden net
Your tongue was the sun
And my body the sky

You drew a map of stars
Across my trembling sky
Where I felt the Milky Way
Burst as a shower of white
Liquid light
I took you all in, all in

When we were done
I left behind me
The invisible scent of my passion
Well expended
Sun, you knew me
Moon, I will never fear you again

My arms may once have been empty
But this mythology I had written
Is now dust on an empty page
And as for your fears
Your disjointed memories
Your fine-tuned misgivings
I have carried them with me,
With me

Let the clouds gather
I laugh and defeat them
Let the desert storm take hold
On the horizon
I cast these out of my heart
Quietly you make love to me
And I take you all in, all in
But now that you have gone
I turn my back on the lacerating present
Let you all in, all in

Darkness, I call you the companion
Of my days
My days the companion of him who
Departed me
And where have I carried you?
Away with me, with me
 

Gossip of Sparrows

(For S, no matter where you go)

Betwixt heaven and earth
The eaves clad in trailing vines
Summon the nests of sparrows
Little birds, little birds
I heard your exasperated calls
Such conversation
Tumbling over a morning breeze

Your gossip reaches my ears
Content not to alight
On ancient willows
Bending beneath their own might
A scent embracing
In the arms of the morning dew

I returned again
To the place where we first kissed
My eyes not innocently caressing
Your hidden skin
Were those chattering sparrows
Eavesdropping?
Did they carry my lust to your ears
Even then?

I passed the afternoon
In idle pursuits
Dreaming of the nightfall
Decorating your bed
With my sweat
Your hard thighs with my kisses
Like prayers

I prayed for you
Locked away my dark secrets
For you
Became a virgin again
For you
But none were taken
You, a god, remained silent
To my prayers

The willows rustled
Over my grave
Waiting for you to bring me flowers
Perhaps jasmine in bloom
Perhaps lilies to entice
A lusty bee

Your sting has captured me
Not deterred my heart's intentions
Your protestations
All were in vain

When the scent of you lingers
Over the dusky mountains
As the stars are ensnared
By the midnight-black veil
An alabaster moon strokes the
Naked earth
As I in my dreams stroke you

It is a blasphemy for any other man
To speak your name
As I do
For wherever you travel
There shall never be another disciple
So penitent at your feet

Betwixt moon and royal sun
The eaves in the evening sing
With the gossip of sparrows
Where lie my intentions, trembling
And you, too, will one day
Wait for the pleasure of
My hand

I Gathered A Pomegranate

A dramatic desert sunset on the Bonneville Salt Flats, Utah/ Photo by the author

(For S )

Ripe pomegranate
You fall not easily
Into my starving hands
My waiting lips
Pressed tight against
Your husk
Your seeds staining
Your fresh gemstones

How quickly
The night falls
Light fading
The yew trees sheltering
A silky spring breeze

I waited beneath
For a single kiss
From your hunting mouth

Taste me so quickly
While the silver stars
Fall across a velvet canopy
While lapis blue night
Shatters over the distant mountains

Greedily you devour a pomegranate
Without care how the crimson
Stains your elegant mouth

Fountains offer their refreshment
Like flowers give up their pollen
And I wish to be like those
Industrious little bees
Dancing from flower to flower to flower

How industrious my wings
How sweet the virgin nectar

You turn away
Blushing so quickly
Even though the scent of me
Stings salty and open thighs

Banish dawn and receive night
The hour this bee takes flight
To gather his honey-sweet love
As the moon showers the earth
With regal splendor

Wait beneath the trees
Excited, your senses newly aroused
And I will swiftly gather
The offering of your body
With my lips

Still moon, sweetly glowing
I bask in it
As the pomegranate bursts
Too hungry was my heart
To gather the crimson jewels

Desolate now, my heart wanders
Could life possibly have sacrificed more?

I Tasted the Desert

A bright and clear Winter afternoon in the desert outside West Wendover, Nevada/ Photo by the author

(For S, and you know why)

Passion that never cools
Cradled by azure skies
Unfold at your feet
Because you, like the ancient mountains,
Command the desert landscape

Silenced, yet still whispering,
A view onto Eternity
Walking by your side,
Holding my breath
For the penetrating wind of changes

Come clouds, cover me
Come tawny cliffs, dominate me
Kiss me, wind of the sun-kissed plain,
And deliver me into your sacred hands

Your heart stills me,
Captivates the dancing feet
Of my consciousness
Stirring, stirring,
Moving fast through my thighs

Between my legs
I hold the vitality of endless peaks,
Stretching upward
To thrust home in the stunning veil
Of Mother Sky

Did you find contentment
In delaying our moment,
My hand soaking up
The desert heat of your chest

I heard your heart beating,
So fast, so firm
And I needed to feel the beating
Of your heart in my hand,
Like I needed the taste of
All of you on my tongue

But even the son of gods
Can be turned out into the desert,
Where the hot song of mid day
Cries out for satisfaction

All too human, my desire
All too divine, your self-control

I damn the resolve of those rocks,
Those mountains,
Those holy stones,
When all my heart wanted
Was to worship at your indomitable feet

I thirsted for your mouth,
Your hot salt on my lips.
I waited for the nakedness of your heart,
Laid open by the sacrificial knife

I drank deeply of our moment together,
But in the end tasted only the desert.

Azure sky, you burn me
Holy mountain, I am your unborn son
Distant lover, I am the miraculous spring,
Waiting impatiently
In the secret stronghold
Of the earth.  

I Sat Near A Stream

Fall leaves give way to Galena Creek, Reno, Nevada/ Photo by the author

I sat near a stream
To see where your love
Would take me.
The trickle of cool water
Carried me away
From the frantic heat
Of a mid day sun
Set high in the empty sky.

You flow with the clouds,
Away and beyond my grasp,
Though once I languished
In your bed
Even long after the sun
Captured the innocent sky.

Tender leaves, falling
Blue-bellied birds, calling
The pallid moon, never falling
Asleep in my waking dreams.

I sat near your coffin
Awaiting your return
To life;
Your chest to rise and fall,
The love in your voice
To call.
But the Summer sun faded
Before my very eyes,
The rising crescent moon
Smitten by midnight skies.

How short are the Winter days
You left behind,
Your hot lips a memory
I have jealously locked away.
The eager pleasure of your
Hard body,
Staying green in the field
Of my abundant memories,
Though the touch of your hands
Has faded, never again.

I sat near a stream
To see where my life would ebb,
How many breaths could I take
Beneath the water
Filling my lungs
With liquid slumber
Like a baby in my mother's womb.

Will the empty sky miss me,
The earth taste my still fair flesh?
How long will the waters flow
Without me,
Once my soul is flying high?

I Could Wring That Sparrow's Neck

A happy bird enjoys Fall trees at Galena Creek Park, Reno, Nevada/ Photo by the author

The Truth was
What you taught me
In my bed at night
When mother slept
Not soundly
As her house crumbled down
Around her
As her heart crashed down
Around us

Stillness throughout
Our prison walls
The birds outside were free
And how I could wring
That sparrow's neck

To be so free
In the bracing clouds
The fields of sapphire blue
Singing as the walls
Fell down around us

Mother, how peacefully
You slept
While my innocence
Disintegrated inside my sheets
Your sheets
His sheets
Wet with my salty sweat

How quickly faith dies
While everything I held to be true
Became lies

Your perfect red lips, your illusions
You slept
While my childhood fell to pieces
Around us

How pious
To feel the words of that black book
Pass clean through me
Like a sword
Cutting, tearing, slicing
My innocence away

Your one "God", your prophets
Your commandments
All lies
And the world falls down
Below you

Sleep soundly now, mother
I dare you to dream again
To feel safe in the silver sky
Lit by a delicate moon
Waning

Are you free
In your sapphire sky
Your affluence?
And do your tears
Taste like diamonds
Cutting hard, tearing harder

I have passed through
All these ephemeral things...
"God", prophets, commandments
While the sparrow sang
Free and embraced by the clouds
As my idealism crashed down
Around me

Now I pick up my two feet
While the earth remains
Still beneath me
Gently calling, calling, calling

Even the free sparrow must alight
To find its home
In the full, green branches
As time passes on around us

One "God", I have no use for you
Prophets, your words failed the naked child
Commandments, your anger and jealousy
I banish from the citizenship of my soul
Black book, your pages have no wisdom left
To bind the passions of my heart
As humanity goes on and on
Without you

Little sparrow, free sparrow
I make peace with your liberated nature
Now that I have let loose
The binds that kept me
As the walls of my boyhood
Crashed down around me

Hush please
And let me sleep tonight
Alone and in peace
In the silver sapphire of the sky
As time and the world
Pass on without me